The S Stands for Hope

Posted on December 19, 2024 by fakedtales
Superman and Krypto on the moon, looking at Earth, a shot referencing All-Star Superman

I have a couple of very specific loves in comics. The X-Men, the Legion of Super-Heroes, the New Warriors. Those are all teams, and when it comes to solo superheroes, it always comes back to Superman for me.

I’m very particular with Superman. As a kid with some fairly simple views, there was too much of the feeling that Superman = establishment = Reaganism and American militarism. Child Charlie was dumb and hadn’t read much Superman at the time.

The original film was breathtaking, and while I saw the Batman films far more than the Supermans, there was always something there which interested me. This powerful person up in the light, whose thoughts were always for other people. All that against the capitalist monster of Lex Luthor, the true form the billionaires take compared to Bruce Wayne or Tony Stark.

Compared to the team books, I pick up and drop Superman comics more often based on the people behind it and their version of Superman.

All-Star Superman, flying too close to the sun.

Grant Morrison’s All-Star Superman was this perfect benevolent being who’s still incredibly human. The great idea of the god who thinks he’s a man versus Lex Luthor’s man who thinks he’s god. The selfless versus the selfish. When faced with his own mortality, Superman has to ‘fix’ anything he can as quick as he can. He needs to make sure the menagerie of alien monsters he looked after are safe, reveal his true self to Lois Lane, redeem Lex Luthor and save the world. And he does in beautiful fashion. 

Here’s Grant explaining some of what Superman means to them:

Kurt Busiek, Mark Waid and even Brian Michael Bendis have got it, with a Superman who’s nice, a bit cheesy, but never boringly grimdark or an easy stooge for the powerful. Bendis’ version had some rubbish villains but cemented him as a slightly cheesy dad type. For Superman, this feels like his true form. He is the ultimate dad after all. 

There was an attempt by JM Straczynski to have Superman get ‘Grounded’ and walk across America making very questionable JM Straczynski proclamations. The series itself almost had me bail from the comic until Chris Roberson came on board and in the second half of the arc it was revealed that someone’s misguided vengeance was forcing Superman to be conflicted, filled with doubt and making rubbish choices like supporting polluting companies against protestors because… jobs, I think? It ended with multi-dimensional Supermen creating a “Fortress of Solidarity”, a counter to the Fortress of Solitude. Another moment that had me welling up.

Superman, together with people who get him.

The current Absolute Superman has been a joy to read, with Superman going back to his socialist roots. The S doesn’t stand for ‘hope’ in this reality as it’s a grim reality. Instead it’s the sign for the labor caste of Kryptonians, with Lara and Jor-El raising Kal on a farm, their scientific minds banned from contributing. In the present, Superman’s helping miners and being hunted by private military contractors. It’s great.

A page from Absolute Superman issue one.

So I’m quite particular with my Superman. He means a lot to me.

When Zack Snyder released a trailer for Man of Steel, my heart leapt. I found it awe-inspiring. My friend Steve and I watched MovieBob’s defences of Snyder’s other works, having only seen 300 and Watchmen by him. I checked the Twitter account of Chris Haley, a person who’s another very good, very specific Superman fan. He was optimistic.

Then I saw the film. To say I was disappointed would be an understatement. Snyder’s objectivism was incredibly present, the product placement, the prettily vengeful Clark Kent, the choice of his father to simply die rather than get rescued, the continued presence of Jor-El (he’s never good whenever he pops up). It was all disappointing. I remember a fight scene so long and uninteresting I could see phones lighting up like a sea of stars in the cinema.

And then Clark murdered Zod. The pair’s fight had caused several 9/11’s worth of damage, definitely killed people and then he killed Zod. There have already been thinkpieces about the scene, the many ways Superman could have avoided murdering. Snyder’s defence of Superman having to commit murder in order not to murder in the future and… that’s not how it works. Most of us have not murdered and wouldn’t murder people. I was so upset and have ranted for many more hours than a sane person should have about it.

I like James Gunn. Super felt like a dark, cynical superhero film but was still enjoyable unlike Kick-Ass which was better than its comic equivalent but had issues anyway. The Guardians of the Galaxy trilogy are some of the better MCU movies and somehow managed to get normal people talking about people like Groot. The Suicide Squad was great, too. 

He’s not a perfect creator, but he gets the heart of these creations even when he’s taking darker and weirder edges. There’s an amount of MCU, “Well, that happened” humour, but it’s not always the case. When The Rock changed the balance of the DCEU by ending it and James Gunn was announced as the person behind the next version of DC in cinemas, I was okay with it. He cited some comics which weren’t just Dark Knight Returns and Death of Superman. His first choice of thing to show was Creature Commandos.

And now there’s a teaser for Superman: Legacy.

I watched it, and I feel like I’m in the same space as I was with the trailer for Man of Steel. There are some great visuals. There’s not enough to get too much of a feel for the characters, but we get way more than just Superman. There’s Krypto! You know, the super-dog! I love that it’s embracing things like Krypto and the pants-on-the-outside look which makes Superman’s costume look less like some generic MCU body armour. There’s Kekex, Superman’s robot. We get glimpses of Lois Lane, Mr Terrific and the wonderful weirdo Nicholas Hoult playing Lex Luthor. There are giant monsters and people chanting Superman’s name. 

I have my hopes up again. Hopefully this time it’ll be for good reason.

Superman and the Superman Family.
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Advent of Abomination – Days Nine, Ten and Eleven

Posted on December 11, 2024 by fakedtales
Advent of Abomination

Days 0-2 can be read here.

Days 3-5 can be read here.

Days 6-8 can be read here.

Day Nine

Something horrible left nearby.

I woke up late this morning. Losing a bit of a schedule can’t have helped. I figured I’d be able to wake up at a normal time naturally, but I’m not waking up for anyone. I don’t really have much of an agenda.

More of the roll-out pain au chocolats. I might have overdone it a bit by adding some Nutella to the chocolate sticks. A bit of a goopy mess. Luckily I just have you, dear journal, as the only witness. I guess there’s the skull, but it’s in the back of the cabin on one of the comfy chairs, just in case that nut job from yesterday’s around.

I went out for a bit of a walk. I still had my shopping list from yesterday which had been abandoned after the woman had freaked me out. The path out of the cabin to the road is covered in uneven stone slabs. They were ‘characterful’, I decided. Charming, rather than sloppily made. Casey would have complained about them. 

Someone had cleared off the stones. I hadn’t, and there was snow through yesterday afternoon and the night. It was light, but it’s been settling. I looked around, I didn’t really have any neighbours near enough to do it out of the goodness of their heart.

As I reached the last stone, I saw red smears in the snow next to it. The stone itself had two circles of dead rats, blood spatter making it look like they were a pair of horrific wreaths. The smell of them hit me and I threw up in the snow, just missing the paving slabs.

I tried to regain my composure, looking at the circles of rats. Someone had nailed the tail of each rat to the head of the next. I looked back at the roof of the cabin. Had there been scuttling last night? After a week I’d become acclimated to it. Was someone helping me out by disposing of the rats? Did someone bring the rats here?

A quick lap of the cabin through the snow left me none the wiser. There were no footprints. I widened the circles, trying to see if there were any tracks, if there was a sign of any cabins which I’d not noticed. It was stupid thinking of that, but I wasn’t sure what else to do. I walked up and down the road. They must have come up and down it, avoiding the snow and keeping to the gritted tarmac. 

I grabbed a bin bag and carefully scooped up the horrible wreath.

Day Ten

You are being watched, how can you tell? Open Special.

I got up early to keep an eye on the driveway and see if there was anyone leaving any grim offerings again. I kept the curtains closed, barring a crack to look through.

Of course, I didn’t want to seem paranoid, or like some kind of weird busybody, so I made breakfast like a normal person and ate it while glaring through the sliver of light in the window.

No one was there. No one came out, no new offering of rats was given. Oh, thinking of the rats, I didn’t hear any scratching on the roof. I guess it must have been the ‘offering’ from yesterday instead of a tree branch or something. 

After looking at what I’ve written, I decided I was sounding like a crazy person. This was my Christmas holiday, my retreat from a break-up, from all the duties of life back in the city. I wasn’t going to be scared by phantoms. I pulled my curtains open and looked at the majestic glare of the winter sun on the snow. It was time to go for a walk.

The lake took my breath away the last time I saw it, and was nice and open. I decided to head down there without my camera, just for a walk. I rushed out of the woods by the cabin and slowed down once I reached the fields. I assumed that when the weather was better they’d be filled with farm animals or something. Right now it was just me, following the tracks I’d made in the snow the other day. 

The lake was still gorgeous, but the ice looked thinner. I paced around the side of the lake until I saw the indentations from my feet the other day, and another pair of footprints in the snow and mud. They looked like they were larger boots than mine. I kept going, keeping an eye out ahead of me. There was a dark patch which I realised was the entrance to a cave. Some old cans and a campfire made it look like it was used as a shelter by people walking or having a pit of a party down there. 

The walls had graffiti and markings which looked older than that. I almost stepped in, and that’s when I saw the skull. Not like my stone one in the cabin. Not quite. It was maybe a sheep or goat skull, sat on an old, rotten wooden bench. There were an extra two eyes drawn on it. And it looked at me.

I turned tail and ran back to the cabin, slipping over in the cold mud a couple of times as I made my way up, up and through the fields.

Day Eleven

Something is broken, what do you do about it?

I woke up early this morning, mainly because of the cold. The place has been toasty for the last… nearly two weeks. God, it hits me sometimes how long I’ve been out here. I admit I’ve been blasting the heat a bit, but it’s been freezing out and it’s not a big place so I don’t feel too bad. I’ve just had a break-up, I can treat myself.

Anyway, this morning was different. The generator mustn’t have been working. I tried to wrap myself tighter in the covers and make myself comfortable despite the cool air. I nodded off for a bit, but then reality hit as I started to hear a dripping noise. It was making me want to go to the loo, but more than that… where was it coming from?

The kitchen, it turns out. The fridge/freezer, more specifically. So that’s been my morning, mopping up the kitchen and seeing what frozen food I can salvage. This afternoon I’ll try to see what’s up with the generator. There’s a problem with being out of the way and this is it. If there’s a rat or a skull or anything else in it, I’m just going to go home. 

>>>

Advent of Abomination is by Black Armada and available here.

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Advent of Abomination – Days Six, Seven and Eight

Posted on December 9, 2024 by fakedtales
Advent of Abomination!

Days 0-2 can be read here.

Days 3-5 can be read here.

Day Six

A wild animal crosses your path. Open Special.

I decided that I’d brush off the bench outside the cabin and have my breakfast coffee in the sun today. It still meant a bit of a damp bum, but I did what I could to keep my dignity intact. It meant wrapping up warm, but was worth it for the smell of the winter air. I didn’t take my camera out and instantly regretted it when I saw something moving in the woods nearby.

I put my mug down and got up, trying to keep an eye out in case it was someone from the nearby village or maybe a hiker. Instinctively, I did my best not to make any noise. I wasn’t likely to be some kind of weird Annie Wilkes murderer or horde of rats, but I was careful anyway.

It was a stag. Like, a big stag. Not moose big, I’ve seen one of those before and nearly lost a car to it when I accidentally went off-road in a Nortdic holiday. Still, this was the first life I found besides birds, and it hadn’t noticed me. It was picking through the woods and felt like it was on a mission. You know the way that sometimes you’ll pass a cat on a street and it doesn’t care about you as it’s got places to me. Basically that kind of attitude.

I watched the stag and found myself following it deeper into the woods. I swear, at one point, it was like it looked back to make sure I was still following. It couldn’t have been doing that. I know that. It was trying to see if there was a predator in the woods. 

Eventually I made a noise. I stepped on a branch, hidden in the deep snow. The stag bolted, leaving me alone in the woods. I walked up to where had been and looked around. It was the clearing from the other day, I hadn’t noticed as I approached it from a different angle. From this way, I could see something under the low branches of a tree. Ducking down, I saw a stone that looked like a skull. I admit I almost fell over when I saw it laying there. It was all my nightmares about things on the roof, things out in the woods validated. I crouched down and approached it, armed with a stick. Brave, I know. A solid poke and the skull rolled. The holes which I thought were eyes weren’t right at the new angle. There were four of them and in different places than a human skull would have. The colour was a stone grey. It was just a stone, obviously. With holes in it, odd-looking, but that was it.

I dragged the thing out and held it in both hands like a bowling ball. The holes were deep, with markings which looked a bit like those suns on the beam in the cellar. Circling each other. Eating each other. I decided to take the ‘skull’ in. The only way to take the power away from these things is to confront them, after all.

Day Seven

News from home. How does it make you feel?

Scrambled eggs for breakfast. I only had a couple left after the pancake extravaganza the other day. The stone ‘skull’ was still on the dining room table, my partner in crime for the next couple of weeks and change.

I just about jumped out of my skin when the letterbox went. I didn’t realise the post was still going this far out, but I guess it’s only early December yet. By the time my heart had calmed down, I could hear the post van leaving. There was my attempt at speaking to another human gone. I guessed I’d have to wander into the village at least to get more eggs soon enough.

The post was barely anything. A postcard from Sam. She wanted to check that I was alright, and not going all Shining in the cabin alone. I couldn’t help but imagine Christmas in the city, surrounded by people, my sister and her partner, the kids, the noise of it all. Would I have been better getting lost in all that, or having this meditative calm out here?

Whatever the answer, I decided I’d write a postcard back and tell them about the lake and the stag, enjoying pancakes and books. Light things. Promises to bore them all with photos soon enough.

Day Eight

An unexpected stranger. What is unsettling about them?

The skull and I had breakfast together and I pondered going out for a wander, possibly reaching the village to grab some supplies and post my postcard to Sam and Lou. I admit I’ve been talking to the skull, I patted it on the head. I’ve not gone full Castaway. I know it’s a big stone, but it’s my big piece of stone. It’s probably coming in the car with me after Christmas.

Reciting a shopping list to the skull wasn’t helping. Instead I decided to get a pen and paper to jot it down. Probably futile as I tend to let my stomach guide me anyway and forget about the note, but again, it’s a ritual.

  • eggs
  • milk
  • bread
  • sweet potatoes
  • chocolate coins
  • book/s?

The chocolate coins from our supplies might have been casualties of the first day or two, the sweet potatoes because I preferred them and compromised for Casey. I can have them myself now.

As I was making the list, there was a slam on the window. I ran to it and refrained from talking to the skull. It’d seem weird if there were onlookers. A person in thick winter clothes stood outside in the light snow. I think they were a woman, but their hat was pulled down their head almost down to their eyes and their hair whipped around in the wind.

”What are you doing?” She shouted.

I asked who she was, what she was doing there. She was far enough back that she must have thrown a snowball or something at the window. They were double-glazed but even so, the noise carried.

”What is that?” She pointed at the skull on the table.

”It’s just a sk— a stone,” I said. I’d already got so used to calling it a skull, which wouldn’t have reassured her.

”Take it out of your house. You shouldn’t have it in there.”

”You shouldn’t be out there throwing snowballs and judging me. I’ll take it out when I want thank you very much,” this was about as assertive as I can get. 

She was shouting, but the wind was picking up. I decided to put the kettle on and ask her to come inside, maybe talk reasonably about what was going on. Maybe I’d disturbed something she’d made. Maybe the stag did.

I went to open the door and was met with the harsh stings of cold air right in my face. I called out to the woman, barely able to open my eyes. She was gone though.

I made a hot chocolate for myself and moved the skull further into the cabin, to keep from bothering her if she came back.

>>>>

This is apparently the end of things being chill. We’ll see how that goes in the next few days’ entries.

Advent of Abomination is by Black Armada and available here.

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Advent of Abomination – Days Three, Four and Five

Posted on December 6, 2024 by fakedtales
Advent of Abomination!

Days 0-2 can be read here.

Day Three

A quirky feature. A little creepy? Open Special.

I found the basement to the cabin. I didn’t think they had them, but apparently this one does. It looks like it’s been carved out some time after the cabin was built, with timber and some really rubbish plaster work making the walls more solid. I could see damp getting in, but hopefully that’s not going to be my problem while I’m staying here.

Apparently this used to be a bit of a workshop, with a work bench and old tools. A lot of them are rusty, I didn’t dare touch them lest I get tetanus. There’s an old sofa which felt distressingly moist when I pushed on an arm of it. Basically, I’m going to keep the basement alone.

When I was on my way out, I caught sight of a carving in the timber. There were a few little ones dotted around, I figured they were just some kid mucking around with a penknife, but this wasn’t. It looked like two suns, with lines like they were circling each other. Feeding off each other. I’m not sure where that thought came from. I decided against getting my phone to take a photo of the carving and just went back upstairs.

I finished Rats, there are a couple of dry looking war books on the shelves here. Beever, mainly. I figure I’ll read one of those, as it’s unlikely to give me bad dreams or make me think of the noises on the roof.

The special door I opened.

Day Four

Comfort food. What does it remind you of?

I couldn’t get through the Beevor, so I spent last night just laying around, unable to get to sleep and trying not to focus on the sounds on the roof. I had a look this morning and it looked like it was just snow and branches moving in the night.

The weather was rough enough that going up a ladder was as daring as I was willing to be. I like snow, but from the other side of a window. Deciding it’s an indoors day, I decided to make some pancakes. They’re more of an Easter thing, really, but I had the supplies and the process is kind of meditative. After years of wrecking pancakes, I’ve got them down to a fine art. Fairly thin and light, but that’s not a bad thing. A little Nutella, some bananas. It’s nothing fancy, but I like it.

Day Five

A beautiful sight. How does it take your breath away?

The snow stopped overnight, so I decided to put on some walking boots and have a bit of a hike. rather than going into the woods, I wanted to go somewhere a bit more open. I’ve got my old digital camera which has about half the megapixels or whatever of my phone, but hopefully it’ll all look a bit retro instead of just shit. 

I found some fields to walk through and took some photos of big vistas, distant woods, hedges. The usual nice snowy things people take pictures of. The snow wasn’t too tricky to wade through and left a satisfying trail which made me more confident in finding my way back to the cabin. After a few hours, I found the lake. It was a stunning sight in the brightness of the afternoon and the cold air. Massive and frozen. It looked like it was from a painting or a cartoon or something. I tried to find a good vantage point a little higher up to get a good shot of it.

After taking a photo or two, I just sat, watching some birds on the lake. As the sun was beginning to go down I could see the pale shadows touching the edge of the lake from some nearby woods. I retraced my steps and made my way back to the cabin.

Advent of Abomination is by Black Armada and available here.

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Advent of Abomination – Days Zero, One and Two

Posted on December 2, 2024 by fakedtales
The advent calendar. Isn’t it scenic?

A game by Josh Fox & Black Armada

I’m on the Black Armada Patreon and last year they put out a solo journaling advent calendar. I loved the idea, but was too lazy to print it out and too forgetful to preorder one in time for Dragonmeet. This year, as well as having a lovely chat with the UK Indie League folks, I picked up one of the few remaining copies.

It’s a folk horror advent calendar, with each door giving a different prompt. As far as I can see it doesn’t need dice, just the calendar and something to write with.

Beware spoilers, as I’m going to try and go through the whole of the Advent of Abomination. 

Day Zero: Going Away

Who are you? Why are you here? Who will you miss?

I’m waiting for a train at the moment and it’s an hour until the next one, so while I was going to wait until I was at the cabin to start this holiday journal, this is going to help kill some time. If I’m lucky it’ll keep my fingers warm as the fingerless gloves aren’t doing enough.

If you find my frozen corpse on Platform 2 of the Caenholm Railway Station, my name’s Martin Price. I’ve spent the last few years staying in fairly remote places with my partner, Casey. It was a great way of avoiding both of our families who are frankly way too much drama. If it was in the middle of nowhere and fairly cosy then all the better. Thing is, places get booked up quickly so as the organised one, I arrange somewhere for us to stay as early as possible.

And that’s why I’m here. Casey and I broke up in October. They’re back with their family now and you know… good for them. I’m not in a good place with mine and while Sam and Lou offered a place at theirs, I didn’t want to be a burden. I’d rented the cabin, I already had a shopping list of supplies, so I’d just spend some time there alone, read some books, get off the grid. If the snow’s not too bad, maybe go out on some walks.

It’ll be good. It’ll be good. If I say it enough times, if I write it down, maybe it’ll even be true.

Day One

A strange sound. What does it make you think of?

Guess what? I survived the trip up to the cabin. It’s quite a walk from the station, I nearly ordered a taxi, but I’m not sure how long that would have taken to arrive and really didn’t want to stand still any longer. 

The cabin’s fairly big… you know, couple-size. I reached the place, turned on the heating and unpacked my clothes just in time for the online delivery to show up. There weren’t many substitutions, luckily. I wasn’t sure if they’d make it from wherever they came from, especially through the snow. I offered them a bottle of water and to use the loo if they wanted, but they were on a clock.

The signal’s sketchy here and the WiFi’s rubbish, mostly working in the bedroom and the left side of the sofa. I decided to treat it as a bit of a detox.

I was originally going to read some Stephen King, specifically Gerald’s Game. I decided against it, as I didn’t want dreams of being trapped and alone in a cabin. I grabbed a James Herbert instead, one of his unsurpassed and unsurpassable Rats trilogy. A work of Marenghian magnificence.

Of course now, I’ll be dreaming of rats in the walls instead. Rats on the roof. Not because of Herbert, god help me, I’ve read the trilogy a few times and they’re hilariously bad. It’s because of noises I heard. Scratches, loud scratches. I genuinely thought someone was on the roof at one point. I went outside and had a look, but there was nothing there. Maybe it was some snow falling from one of the trees near the cabin. I don’t know. 

Wish me luck with my dreams!

Day Two

A comfortable place. What do you do there?

The rats didn’t return, either in the real world or in my dreams. I got the freezer pain au chocolates (chocolatses?) out and put them together, breaking a bunch of the weird chocolate sticks you put in before you unroll them. They were alright to eat and I’ve got leftovers of them for lunch as I ended up making enough for me and Casey.

I went out walking, not to the village as it felt a long walk just to see their shops which are probably closed for the winter. The paperwork about the cabin said there were some nice woods to walk in with some cultivated pathways, so it’s easier to walk even in the bad weather.

Luckily it was cold, but bright. You could hear the creaking of the snow in the trees. The ground was more treacherous than I’d hoped and I almost slipped over on what looked like fairly stable earth. After a couple of hours I was warming up, but a bit tired. All these years of sedentary work has done in my stamina. Hopefully this time away will help build some up. 

I’d gone off the path and wandered through some old woods, past a dew pond which was frozen over. I don’t know if it was used or not, but there were a lot of old trees with their branches dipping into it, all frozen in place now. Beyond that, I found a nice little clearing. Some tightly-packed trees meant that there wasn’t as much snow, I was able to brush off a stump and have a sit for a time. The snow and the light meant that even the shade was a kind of pale blue. I took a few minutes to sit there and regain my breath before returning past the dew pond, to the path and then to the cabin.

Advent of Abomination is by Black Armada and available here.

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Between the X-Men

Posted on November 22, 2024 by fakedtales
A Victorian X-Men team from an alternate reality, about to solve a murder!

The Between is a game from The Gauntlet which recently finished a campaign on BackerKit. The game’s about Victorian monster hunters who are incredibly messy people. As they investigate mysteries, they often become part of them and could often be seen as pretty villainous.

The X-Men are a group of superheroes made by Marvel who despite their intentions are often hated and feared by humanity who sees them as their own extinction. They try to help other mutants from human, mutant and robot threats. The journey to mutant liberation is a fraught one and the team’s often populated by people who have at one time or another been villains.

I’m a fan of both these messy groups, and while I was watching The Between’s campaign break the record for how much overtime it was running into on BackerKit, I decided to do something involving both these fandoms over on BlueSky. I enjoyed doing it, but I thought I’d expand on it here.

The Between’s protagonists, all about to investigate a mystery.

The American: James Howlett aka Logan aka Wolverine

Wolverine’s past. Not a great moment.

We’re going to gloss over the fact that Wolverine’s technically Canadian, because he’s pretty perfect for this role.

The American is the ‘werewolf’ playbook, born of a wealthy family originally, cursed by a feral rage which comes out at night. They’re hunted by officials and the fear that they might become a threat to everyone around them.

James Howlett was born to a wealthy family and marked by tragedy, taking the name Logan and resorting to a feral life in the wilderness. Over the years, he was hunted, made into a weapon and managed to eventually break free of everyone, joining the X-Men. Even so, he’s prone to a berserker rage which can be deadly when coupled with his unbreakable bones.

The Explorer: Professor Charles Francis Xavier aka Professor X

The X-Men’s Problematic Dad

Here was the playbook & character mix-up that made me think of it. The problematic boss.

The Explorer is the ‘campaign’ character, with a relationship with the Mastermind where they have had connections and will be intertwined in their chess match. They travelled the world, colonised places, have a mountain range named after them and left behind a lot of scars. Now they have a lot of contacts from their place of privilege and can call on them for help. Their Masks of the Past don’t look into their backstory but instead show The Boy, who was taken in and abandoned by The Explorer. Their final Mask of the Future has The Boy return and physically destroy The Explorer.

Charles Xavier is the founder of the X-Men and a king of hubris. In his youth he travelled the world, sometimes even with his stepbrother Cain. He met ‘Magnus’, they worked together until they fell out, then he got his legs crushed and went home in a wheelchair. He founded the X-Men and in the name of doing good, often did some abominable things with his telepathy. Folks often mention that he created a child army and… that’s not entirely wrong. He did things like wiped the memories of everyone who knew Hank McCoy in his hometown to make it easier to adopt him, completely wiped Magneto’s mind once, had a whole second X-Men team who died, enslaved a robot and turned it into a Holodeck. The list goes on. I think to make him work as The Explorer, his contacts would have to be his students. I’m not sure who The Boy would be, but there are a lot of candidates.

The Factotum: Forge

The first appearance of Forge in his little shorts, showing off his bionic bits.

Forge has almost never been a core member of the X-Men and that’s part of the point here.

The Factotum is a servant at Hargrave House, they have their own background and life, bur that’s not important. They are probably the most competent person in the group, but they will not get recognised for it, living a life of service instead.

Forge aka Maker does have a place of his own unlike the Factotum, generally Eagle Plaza in Dallas. Like the Factotum he has his own dreams and ambitions (a lot of them being Storm), but they will always be unfulfilled. He’s rarely been part of the X-Men outside of as a support role. He makes their technology, repairs them and even in a leadership role with X-Factor ends up helping others out. On the nation of Krakoa, he helped give Domino a weird biological arm-weapon and Wolverine an adamantium surfboard. Now that’s service!

The Mother: Dr Henry Philip McCoy aka The Beast

Beast and an army of clones he’s intentionally made weaker than him, making a clone army of Wolverines.

The Mother is clinical, rational and has a grim project. They’re the ones most eager to get their hands bloody, to dig up graves and assist the authorities in order to get what they want. They have a creature they’re making, one they’re emotionally attached to, harvesting body parts and eventually animating it.

The version of Beast I’m thinking of here is the one from the modern age, where he was the Henry Kissinger of mutantkind, carrying out clinical genocides and cloning an army of Wolverines to assassinate people in the name of Krakoa. The truth is, he was always leading down this path. He experimented on himself and went all grey (then blue). He traded a mentally unwell unhoused woman to Mr Sinister for information. He killed an alternate reality just in case it was bad. Then there was all of the mutant CIA stuff.

The Orphan: Dr Hank McCoy aka The Beast

Hank McCoy The Younger

This was a fun thought, so I had to follow it.

The Orphan is an unlockable playbook, accessible if The Mother completes their project and things don’t go too badly. They’re helpful and bear the sins of their creator. You have some friends, but also may give in to the occasional rage.

Beast left behind a backup version of himself from his Avengers stoner friend of Wonder Man era as he felt it was useless. The X-Men decided to use it to help stop the older, more evil Beast and his clone army. Now this Hank’s the reigning Beast. He’s aware he’s atoning for things another version of him did, a version he could become. He’s not quite a clone, but he’s angry about what he’s done, what he could do and how things have turned out. 

The Undeniable: Emma Grace Frost aka The White Queen

Emma Frost in the Victorian alternate reality isn’t too far away from the regular version.

This was difficult. I nearly went with Storm, but there are enough elements of Emma Frost which work better with it.

The Undeniable is a Dorian Grey kind of character. They’re beautiful, immortal and heartless. Somewhere, there’s a work of art looked after by a cult. When hurt or when they transgress, the work of art is scarred somehow. They have a lot of potential to be a real villain.

Emma Frost started out as a villain and a member of the Hellfire Club, one of the most Chris Claremont creations he made in his run writing the X-Men. Despite this, she actually was a good teacher (apart from the time she exploded a horse… it’s assumed she was on a LOT of drugs during her Hellfire days). She joined Generation X as a teacher and then the X-Men after a mutant genocide. Since then she’s alternated between active team member, teacher and reverting back to her Hellfire Club ways. To use her as the Undeniable, the work of art AND the cult could be her students. That way they get worse or end up dying, like too many of her students have, all while she remains a flawless diamond.

The Vessel: Jean Elaine Grey aka Marvel Girl aka Phoenix

Fire and Life Incarnate

Another perfect fit with very little change needed.

The Vessel is as close as you get to a Magic-User in The Between. The magic specifically comes from dark forces who are attracted to The Vessel. They’re drawn to darkness and threatened to be consumed by it.

Jean Grey is a good person, more than you’d think for The Vessel, but that doesn’t mean she’s a nice person. The Phoenix was drawn to her and took her place for a time, living as her. Later, it became more clear that it was still Jean in some way, even if it wasn’t her body. As Phoenix, she is fire and life incarnate. She’s killed a planet, she made Mastermind so cosmically aware that it broke his brain. While Phoenix died and became Jean again, the pair have been linked many times as Phoenix can never really give up Jean. Just re-flavour the dark forces and maybe have the Witches as worshippers of it.

The Mastermind Theodora Braithwaite: Max Eisenhardt aka Erik Lensherr aka Magnus aka Magneto

Professor X and Magneto in their coordinated outfits at the Hellfire Gala.

This isn’t really a playbook, but the season’s big bad. Theodora Braithwaite was a victim of colonisation, a pirate and after a falling out with the Queen, wants to use a campaign of terror to take control and rule without any concern about morality. She’s ominous and ever-present, a Moriarty figure to the hunters of Hargrave House.

Magneto is the best friend and worst enemy of Professor X. The two are intrinsically linked, each others’ biggest defender and hater all at the same time. Magneto, as the saying goes, made some valid points. He knew that mutants may get tolerated but won’t get accepted, not really. He wanted to take over for mutantkind, viewing them as superior and ignoring any assimilationist/integration-based ideas. He’d be a great Mastermind to have linked to the Explorer.

Bonuses:

You can hear Limp Bizkit in the background of this panel.

The Martian is an alien with strange powers and inherited weapons. My choice for him would be Adam X, The X-Treme, specifically the version from Fabian Nicieza where he was a bit more of a Luke Skywalker than a Limp Bizkit fan. His powers allow him to electrocute people’s blood, but it has to be exposed, so his costume is covered in knives. He also skateboards, because he’s from the 90’s.

The Informals are helpers to Hargrave House. You play a number of them, each with their own abilities but also all doomed. To be honest, these are probably the New Mutants or New X-Men, as they’re all useful but to have a terrible amount of casualties. Poor Doug. And Jay. And two of the Stepford Cuckoos. And so on, and so on.

The Legacy is hunting a beast, defining it at they go. I was tempted to say Cyclops as my boy’s not appeared on the list yet and hunting Sinister would work here. Instead, I’m going to say Bishop, given his hunt for a traitor to the X-Men and his combat abilities. Sometimes he goes through periods of trying to be peaceful, other times he burns the world to make his hunt easier.

The Underground is an Alice in Wonderland type character, thought to be mad and having spent a lot of time in a strange Wonderland. This is one of the new ones, so I don’t know a lot about it, but my first instinct is Longshot. Longshot comes from a strange wonderland called The Mojoverse, run by spineless creatures who get nightmares from our television signals and turned that into their belief system. Longshot’s often lost there, leading resistance efforts and then getting mindwiped. He’s often more Dorothy than he is Alice, but I feel this works. Oh, and he’s also his own grandfather/grandson, but that’s neither here nor there.

The Volatile would be Beast or Forge if they weren’t already claimed. As someone who keeps modifying themselves in volatile ways with science, you could probably get away with having Mr Sinister as them, as he has been someone who keeps tinkering with his genetics. Alternatively if you want someone a little less evil, there’s Greycrow, who has a ton of cybernetic modifications and is always tinkering with himself. He’s also emotionally pretty volatile.

The Dodger is Gambit, obviously.

That is all and I will not be taking any questions.

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Casual Trek 55 – Moopsy Did One or Two Things Wrong

Posted on November 21, 2024 by fakedtales
Moopsy doing a bit of a murder.

Moopsy!

As Lower Decks is back for the last time, we’re looking at three animated Star Trek episodes, specifically ones about strange creatures.

The Eye of the Beholder brings us weird dopey-looking elephant slug things who are actually more evolved than humans!

A Tribble Called Quest brings us all kinds of mutant tribbles including a bizarre horrible Tribble with a face! Ugh…

I Have No Bones, Yet I Must Scream brings us an adorable monster in Moopsy, who may have done one or two things wrong.

Moopsy!

https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/casual-trek/episodes/Moopsy-Did-One-or-Two-Things-Wrong-e2qq4mv

This has been a weird day for Scotty.

00:03:55 What Non-Star Trek Thing We’ve Been Enjoying: Still Wakes the Deep, Kew Gardens’ Halloween Trail

00:09:58 Star Trek: The Animated Series “The Eye of the Beholder”

00:35:37 Star Trek: Prodigy “A Tribble Called Quest”

00:56:03 Star Trek: Lower Decks “I Have No Bones, Yet I Must Scream”

Talking points include: Pokémon, which Pokémon wore sunglasses the best? Dave Willis, Still Wakes the Deep, big ups to The Chinese Room, Alien Isolation, Kew Gardens, Merry Xmas Everyone, that song from X-Men Apocalypse or whatever one it was, Charlie tries to remember X-Men: Dark Phoenix, Roger Dean album covers, sand trouts in Dune, that one Flight of the Conchords song where a leg gets eaten, Play-Doh, Morph, vast, desolate landscapes, does The Federation still have Timpsons? You don’t put the Scottish in a zoo, space zoos, Equilibrium, at some point Charlie should watch Star Trek, dunking on Chakotay, picking up a story partway through, Peter David’s weird universal Majel Barrett thing, X-Men, I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream, Todd in the Shadows, Miles gets angry at Charlie, the show and himself for having to listen to Oliver Anthony Music, Anthony Michael Hall, self-destructive insubordination at work, bones and teeth aren’t the same thing, Charlie’s childhood rabbit and the little bunny gulag, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Nolan North, Vegeta & Goku workforce dynamics, trying to stop from having any Big Bang Theory rants, can you tell Charlie’s vamping for time because he forgot who wrote I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream? The Spoony Experiment, Awesomed by Comics, Miles was right to be a despairing heap on a men’s room floor given the election results. Oh, and occasionally Star Trek.

It’s truly horrid.

Pedant’s Corner:

  • While I don’t recall Karate Kid being in a zoo in The Legion of Super-Heroes, there was a tragic story about Beast Boy of Lallor dying defending a girl from a zoo animal.
  • The fish that nibble you in those baths are not piranhas. DO NOT have piranhas nibble your feet.
  • Oliver Anthony Music has since given up music, I assume it was pressure from us at Casual Trek.
  • Peter Pan isn’t killed in the holodeck, but Robin Hood
  • Official Moopsy Plush: https://www.masterreplicas.com/products/star-trek-lower-desks-moopsy-plush-10inch

Casual Trek is by Charlie Etheridge-Nunn and Miles Reid-Lobatto, guest starring Reanna Reid-Lobattto and a sample of Harlan Ellison’s I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream.

Music by Alfred Etheridge-Nunn

Casual Trek is a part of the Nerd & Tie Network

Casual Trek’s Ko-Fi Page: https://ko-fi.com/casualtrek

Miles’ blog: http://www.mareidlobatto.wordpress.com 

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Casual Trek 53 – Banned by the Beeb II: Garth of Izar’s Glam Rock Band

Posted on October 19, 2024 by fakedtales

Show notes by Miles Reid-Lobatto

Who’s your favourite band member? I like Stone Tellarite and Green Batgirl

Dust off your illegal VHS tapes and be prepared to write a strongly worded letter to Points of View because we’re back with the second part of our ‘Banned by the Beeb’ two-parter looking at three more episodes of Star Trek that suffered the wrath of British censorship.

We’re back with three episodes, the final two banned TOS episodes, starting with ‘The Empath’ where William Shatner has to do some Dark Place style slow-motion running and McCoy definitely violates some medical practices as our latest butt-headed aliens the Vians pull out the chains and then with ‘Whom Gods Destroy’ where Kirk and Spock are repeatedly taken in and out of rooms and forced to ask chess questions by a mad-man in mismatched boots. Which episode is more controversial – SHOOT THEM BOTH, SPOCK! But after that, the fun and hijinks go away with ‘The High Ground,’ a TNG episode banned due to a line about Irish Reunification and Miles and Charlie find themselves having to ponder the age old question, can a show written, produced and made by Americans talk about how fighting for independence against oppressive colonialist Imperialism and somehow seem to conclude that it’s a bad thing, actually. Or, as Miles’ wife Reanna said as she watched the episode with him ‘Gosh, this has aged well.’ There are some things we can try to make fun, not everything.

Episodes discussed

  • ‘The Empath’ (11:37)
  • ‘Whom Gods Destroy’ (42:59)
  • ‘The High Ground (01:08:30)
Oh Data…

Talking Points Include: THEY PUT BABY SUPERMAN IN A MICROWAVE?!?!, Judge Dredd killing the Jolly Green Giant, dialogue censorship in American comics, Miles’ 12th Wedding Anniversary is a good excuse to go off on how amazing the film ‘Lifeforce’ is, Alex Garland’s ‘Annihilation,’ Patrick Stewart’s first movie kiss, Charlie has a physical subscription to 2000 AD (Lucky Bugger, Miles has to do digital), 2000 AD and Judge Dredd Megazine, SHIFT Magazine that Charlie has a story in, Alan Moore’s ‘The March of the Sinister Ducks,’ ‘Love Child’, Miles tries his empathic powers, the three different alien physicalities of Star Trek, DeForest Kelley’s favourite episode, Hurt/Comfort fanfic, sometimes you can tell that the cast know the show’s getting cancelled soon, Hellraiser and the Cenobites would hate dealing with Starfleet, old make-up techniques, how the characters have become less real over the first three seasons, William Shatner doing his slow-mo running, the British hatred of Morris Men and all they stand for, how a lot of modern comedy lacks actual stakes, The Beatles vs. The Rolling Stones, Jeff knows what he’s done, Yvonne Craig (TV’s Batgirl) as a dancing girl, Mental Health doesn’t work how Star Trek thinks it works, lots of shouting, oh God more Am-Dram, Legion of Super-Heroes, did Wayne’s World ruin the name ‘Garth?’ Double-Nerve Pinch, ‘Pointy-Eared Bum Head!’Garth’s really bad Glam-Rock band, did the BBC have a point? Power-Mad-Starbucks Supervisors, padding, Kylie Minogue, Michael Bolton, where do Americans know Kylie Monogue from? the Troubles, the IRA’s attempt to assassinate Thatcher in the 80s (in Miles and Charlie’s hometown no less!), Picard is unable to answer the important question ‘What is terrorism?’ and ‘but doesn’t terrorism occasionally work for good outcomes?’, does Magneto have a point? Imperialism, Colonialism, Centrists are the worst, it really stops being fun talking points for The High Ground, the actor playing Finn seems to be going for a Jack Nicholson-esque drawl to sound dangerous, but he just sounds utterly checked out. And sometimes Star Trek.

Pedants Corner: ‘Neighbours’ was a long running Australian soap-opera that would air in the 5:30 timeslot Monday-Friday evening BBC 1 slot after the kids’ programming ended and before the 6 o’Clock News.

Casual Trek is by Charlie Etheridge-Nunn and Miles Reid-Lobatto

Music by Alfred Etheridge-Nunn

Casual Trek is a part of the Nerd & Tie Network

Pay us money in return for an episode! https://ko-fi.com/casualtrek

Miles’ blog: http://www.mareidlobatto.wordpress.com 

The mime is getting a bit melodramatic.
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Casual Trek 52 – Deepfake Riker (guest starring Sean Corse)

Posted on September 30, 2024 by fakedtales

We have an interloper in the podcast! It’s Sean Corse of Famicom Dojo and Two Boobs Watch the Tube fame, here in the spirit of Nerd & Tie unification.

This episode we’re looking at the Unification trilogy, a multi-part story that spans multiple Star Trek series and over 800 years! First up, Picard and Data go to Romulus to hunt down Spock, who might have turned traitor! We also have Riker chatting up a multi-armed widow and a junkyard guy who has way too many face-folds.

Then, we fast forward to Discovery in their grimdark future era and while unifying the Romulans and Vulcans is a good thing, this is actually still all about Michael. Oh, and Tilly, take the damn job already!

  • 00:05:43 What non-Star Trek things we’ve been enjoying: House of the Dragon Season Two, Paddington 2, Taskmaster New Zealand
  • 00:21:30 Star Trek: The Next Generation “Unification I & II”
  • 01:13:26 Star Trek: Discovery “Unification III”

Talking points include: Three Kingdoms, Third Doctor, Farscape, Sean paying for Twitter, Famicom Dojo, Two Boobs Watch the Tube, Quantum Leap (old and new), A World of Ice & Fire, the old Indiana Jones video game, Tom Bombadil, lengthy definitions of “Twee”, Ted Lasso, Kate Fox’s Watching the English, Taskmaster New Zealand, Americans understanding Vic Reeves, Adam Adamant, Bono’s Vertigo Comics look, Miles is coming for David Tennant, Actually liking a U2 track, our threat of a Lost podcast, the guy played by Cameron from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (also from Bunheads), some X-Men level convoluted BS, Come On Eileen, Romulan retirement plans, sleazy space bars, Hitchiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Riker deepfakes, are Bones and Spock married? Golden Landis Von Jones, Jimmy from Degrassi, Marion Morrison, Todd in the Shadows, two Brits out-awkwarding an American, Brexit, heists, Space: 1999, we’re all about the cheese, Blake’s 7, Fringe Season Five, Will Section 31 be Guardians of the Galaxy or will it be Borderlands the Movie? Oh, and occasionally Star Trek.

Pedant’s Corner: 

  • Vic Reeves was not on Taskmaster, but Bob Mortimer was
  • We all butchered the name of U2’s Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me
  • The Enterprise switches the lights OFF, not on, when they pretend to be a wreck
  • I have no idea where Sean got the thing about plant-based Vulcans
  • Carbon Creek took place in 1957

Casual Trek is by Charlie Etheridge-Nunn and Miles Reid-Lobatto

Music by Alfred Etheridge-Nunn

Casual Trek is a part of the Nerd & Tie Network

Buy us a Ko-Fi and we’ll cover an episode of your choice! https://ko-fi.com/casualtrek

Check out Sean on Famicom Dojo: https://famicomdojo.tv 

He’s also on Two Boobs Watch the Tube: https://www.nerdandtie.com/thetube/

Miles’ blog: http://www.mareidlobatto.wordpress.com 

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Another Casual Christmas

Posted on December 30, 2023 by fakedtales

Casual Trek Shownotes by Miles Reid-Lobatto

Ben Sisko and Benny Russell

It’s Christmas Day and we’re giving you the gift of a new episode of Casual Trek and we’re now, as is traditional, gifting each-other an episode of Star Trek each to cover for the holiday season.

There must be something in the air because both Miles and Charlie decide to go with a nice present instead of any potential lumps of coal. Miles desire to make reperations for Tek War results in us getting a good example of film noir in Deep Space 9’s Necessary Evil while Charlie gifts Miles a chance to talk about both racism and post-war SF with Far Beyond the Stars, another Deep Space 9 classic, thank goodness there’s seven season of Deep Space 9 or we might be in trouble!

Episodes include

  • DS9: Necessary Evil (13:49)
  • DS9: Far Beyond the Stars (41:44)

Talking Points include: Christmas Traditions with the family, The Goes Wrong Show and Fawlty Towers, Is there a bad episode of DS9? The strange Mandela Effect of the Meat Loaf song ‘I Would Do Anything For Love.’ Thanks to the court case, we are now no longer allowed to say that Sean Orange pays for Twitter while then going on to probably offend all our US listeners, while Charlie makes some small attempt to curb his unreasoning hatred of Blake’s 7 (Miles wrote these notes BTW) Yes, we’re doing Threshold when we hit the 100th episode of Star Trek covered for the show. Miles’ Most Passive Aggressive Handover at Starbucks. Prequels needlessly making big introductions of everything, including Hercules Poirot’s mustaches. Quark’s Code-switching. Hiding stuff in walls. Miles has been a dick at many a job. The closest character we could compare Odo to is Judge Dredd… not great. Claude Raines in Casablanca. How long can a collaborator remain on the sidelines? One more ALLAMARAINE for the season. We’ll see how long it takes Charlie to hate Blake’s 7 again. SF Writers of the Post-War Age, Golden Age vs. New Wave, Policy Brutality, The Harlem Renaissance, LET’S GET POLITICAL AT CHRISTMAS TIMES, don’t trust Centrists, Police Brutality in Riverdale, the ideas of Science-Fiction that can change the world, THE CURRENT EDITOR IN CHIEF OF MARVEL PRETENDED TO BE JAPANESE IN ORDER TO GET WRITING GIGS, the problems with our Big List, what is a ‘Unit of Star Trek,’ Top Trumps, the NPR Star Wars Radio Dramas

Don’t they look so merry.

PEDANT NOTES: Miles refers to Kira as a Collaborator instead of a resistance fighter as I meant to. Claude Reins doesn’t shoot the Nazi in Casablanca, but helps cover up Rick’s role.

NEXT WEEK: Saddle up partner as we head to the Wild West… in Space!

You can find Casual Trek “Another Casual Christmas” on Spotify, all good podcatchers and here.

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